About this title: Waking up after a fantastic night unlike any he's ever had, C. Thomas Flood discovers the woman of his dreams is a vampire, and surprise, he's one now, too. Making their relationship work is the least of their problems. A dangerous faction of old longteeth is bent on wiping out new vampires.
Note: This is a general synopsis. Each listing is described below.
Binding: Hardcover
Publisher: William Morrow
Date Published: 2007
ISBN-13:9780060590291ISBN:0060590297
Description: Good. A copy that has been read, but remains in clean condition. All pages are intact, and the cover is intact (including dustcover, if applicable). The spine may show signs of wear. Pages can include limited notes and highlighting, and the copy can include "from the library of" labels. ******PLEASE NOTE****** Orders placed after Dec. 7 cannot be guaranteed delivery before Christmas unless you select EXPEDITED shipping! Thank you & Happy Holidays! read more
Binding: Hardcover
Publisher: William Morrow & Company
Date Published: 2007
ISBN-13:9780060590291ISBN:0060590297
Description: Good in good dust jacket. Ex-library. Usual ex lib stickers inside Pages Clean. Sewn binding. Cloth over boards. 336 p. Audience: General/trade. read more
Description: Very Good. Great condition for a used book! Minimal wear. Shipped to over one million happy customers. Your purchase benefits world literacy! read more
Description: Used-Very Good. Very good condition. Felt pen remainder mark; very clean and bright pages; Book has almost no shelfwear; slightly loose spine Delivery confirmation available for every book shipped. Reliable customer service and no-hassle return policy. read more
Description: Good. 0060590300 25788 PB; spine smooth, text appears clean, cover has slight shelf wear-allow up to 21 business days for standard USPS media ma i l. wt1lbpf. read more
Description: Fine. Trade Paperback. Harper Paperbacks, 2008. Fine Book. Overall, a clean and tight, lightly read copy. Media mail packed in protective bubble lined shipping bags, Priority in a Flat Rate Envelope. Shipped quickly. Prompt response to questions. read more
Description: Reader copy. Ex-Public Library. HEAVY COVER AND PAGE CORNER WEAR. Text is clean. A few coffee spots on page tops. Usual library stickers and stamps. Save a tree-buy used.. read more
Description: Reader copy. Ex-Public Library. COVERS AND PAGE CORNERS SHOW HEAVY WEAR. HEAVILY COCKED SPINE. TEXT IS GREAT. Library stamps & stickers. SAVE A TREE-BUY USED! ! read more
Edition: First Edition
Binding: Hardcover
Publisher: William Morrow
ISBN-13:9780060590291ISBN:0060590297
Description: Used-Good in Good jacket. FIRST EDITION hardcover; Good condition. clean pages; book has minor shelf wear; tight spine; black remainder mark on bottom of book; Reliable customer service and no-hassle return policy. read more
Binding: Audio CD
Publisher: HarperAudio
Date Published: 2007-01-01
ISBN-13:9780061227189ISBN:0061227188
Description: New. A great audio cd book in good condition. FREE TRACKING in US and email to you when shipped. Inquires welcomed and we want your complete satisfaction! read more
Description: William Morrow / HarperCollins, 2007. 328 pages. 1st printing / edition. Hardcover. Very Good+ in Very Good+ dust jacket. Jacket has a tiny nick bottom front edge. Bright and solid; no names or marks. ISBN: 0060590297. read more
Edition: First Edition
Binding: Hardcover
Publisher: William Morrow, New York
Date Published: 2007
ISBN-13:9780060590291ISBN:0060590297
Description: Very Good in Very Good- jacket. 0060590297 8vo-over 7¾"-9¾" tall The dust jacket has light edge wear and is lightly rubbed and the dust jacket is in a Mylar type protector. read more
Binding: Trade Paperback
Publisher: HarperCollins
Date Published: 2008
ISBN-13:9780060590307ISBN:0060590300
Description: Good + Cover has marks, bumping, edgewear, chipping, small tears, sticker-Marks on edge-Bumped pgs-Marks on some pgs-Light edgewear-Light dents. read more
Binding: Hardcover
Publisher: William Morrow & Company
Date Published: 2007
ISBN-13:9780060590291ISBN:0060590297
Description: Fine in fine dust jacket. Sewn binding. Cloth over boards. 336 p. Audience: General/trade. like new, crisp, clean, unmarked unread copy. read more
So begins the witty, sarcastic, bawdy romp that is You Suck -- a vampire book that makes other vampire books look positively Puritanical by comparison.
Tommy Flood awakens to find that his vampire girlfriend Jody has changed him into a vampire so she has company for the rest of time. Although at first he is a bit peeved, Tommy quickly finds that being a vampire isn't so bad -- the heightened senses make their sex even more exciting. However, the problem of food quickly arises. Jody used to feed on Tommy to keep herself alive -- but now her food source is gone and there are two hungry mouths to feed. They solve this problem creatively -- borrowing a homeless man's extremely large cat. In exchange for some booze, the cat is available for their nightly feasting.
Still, a vampire needs minions, which leads to the acquisition of Abby Normal -- teenage Goth and vampire wannabe -- whose diary entries are interspersed throughout the book and chronicle the travails of serving the Vampyre Flood and the Countess.
But even with a minion, Jody and Tommy's problems aren't quite solved. There is the little problem of the ancient vampire who created Jody and is currently trapped in bronze -- where Tommy and his band of vampire-fighting Safeway stock boys (the Animals) put him after robbing him of all his money and blowing up his yacht. And when Tommy's plan to dump the bronze statue containing the ancient vampire in the San Francisco Bay doesn't quite go as planned and the old vampire escapes -- well, trouble is afoot.
But wait...that's not all. The Animals are back from Vegas and have blown almost all the stolen money. But they are not alone. They are accompanied by Blue -- a Vegas hooker whose shtick is that her entire body is dyed blue (you know, like the Blue Man Group). She seems to have a supernatural hold on the Animals (or maybe it is the drugs), but she is slowly but surely getting all of their stolen money. Seeking help from their leader Tommy, the Animals are stunned to find that Tommy is not quite himself anymore. But Blue sees an opportunity.
And did I mention the murder investigation into the mysterious serial killer whose been terrorizing San Francisco and leaving the victims drained of blood?
My Thoughts
This book is not for everybody. I'm just going to go ahead and say that up-front. There is graphic language, drug use, sex scenes, violence, corruption of minors, drunkeness -- well, there is a little bit of everything. If material of this nature offends you, this book is not for you. However, if this stuff doesn't bother you and you have a dark sense of humor, this book is a must read! I just loved it. Let me put it this way, if you like movies like Pulp Fiction and find them funny, then you'll love this book. It has the same dark, twisted sense of humor.
After reading the Twilight books (which take vampires very very seriously), it was fun to see an author have a bit of fun with the concept of vampires. From making fun of Goth kids (who "outvampire" Tommy when he goes to a club looking for Abby) to Abby's reverential treatment of "the Vampyre Flood" (at least until she finds out he's only been a vampire for a week or so -- not centuries), Moore has a lot of fun with the vampire myths. One chapter, simply called "The Last Poop," reads in its entirety:
"So that was it?" "Yep." "Never again?" "Nope." "Not ever?" "Nope." "I feel like I should save them or something." "Would you just flush and come out of there."
From worrying about Christmas gifts for their families to missing coffee to figuring out how to feed without murdering the innocent (they target those who are terminally ill and offer them mercy killing), Tommy and Jody retain much of their human qualities and compassion. And when Jody talks about how she never really felt safe until she became a vampire, I nodded my head in recognition. (What woman doesn't feel vulnerable when walking alone in a city? Wouldn't superhuman powers, strength and speed make you feel invincible too?)
Moore has a wonderfully sick sense of humor and isn't afraid to to use it. I thought the book was a lot of fun. I'll definitely be seeking out more books by this author -- which include titles such as Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal, The Stupidest Angel, Practical Demonkeeping, and Island of the Sequined Love Nun. I suspect I'm in for quite a wild ride.
A Side Note: Don't underestimate the fun of reading a book entitled You Suck. I was reading this during my son's karate lesson and saw quite a few people eyeing up the cover and furrowing their eyebrows and seeming to think: "Is she trying to tell us something?" It was kind of a cheap thrill.
My Final Recommendation
If you have a dark sense of humor and don't mind graphic language and material, this book might be right up your alley -- especially if the idea of a bawdy, witty romp that has fun with vampirism appeals to you. However, if this type of material isn't your cup of tea, I'd skip this book and look for something a little tamer. Although I found the book very amusing and fun, it isn't for everyone."
"When I first started the book, I thought it was going to be cute and mostly annoying. Cut to about 40 pages later and I was loving it. It's very funny and clever and there's also a bit of an intrigue aspect which kept me hooked. I've since read one other book by Christopher Moore and I'm planning to read many others."
"For some people the whole biting and blood thing would have been kind of a big deal, But Tommy and Jody are in love, and they work through their issues. Like how much Jody should teach Tommy about his new superpowers and how much he needs to learn on his own. Tommy's cute new minion, sixteen-year-old Goth girl Abby Normal. Making the relationship work, however, is the least of Jody and Tommy's problems. The vampire who nibbled on Jody wasn't supposed to be recruiting any new members into the club. Even worse, Tommy's turkey bowling friends are out to get him, at the urging of a blue-dyed Las Vegas call girl named Blue. I enjoyed this book because it gave me a new taste of something different. I'm not into vampires or anything like it but my cousin did tell me I was going to like this one. I usually like to read street-novels or true stories, but I must say that this new subject was good. I would connect this book to text to text because to me this book is similar to the Twilight series just a bit more of a comedy. The couple in this book have some obstacles to face throughout the entire book none of which ever to please the reader. "You suck" is a humorous and enjoyable book written by Christopher Moore. Even after the story has come to an end you can't help but keep thinking of what could happen next. "You Suck" is a must read for any teens or young adults."
"Loved, loved, loved this book. Don't get me wrong--this is not "literature," but it is a hilarious read! The story is ridiculous (modern day vampires), but Moore has a way with words and wacky situations. This book has one of my now all-time favorite characters: a Gothalicious teenager named Abby Normal (Allison is her "day-slave name," HA) who is thrilled to become "minion" to these goofy, young vampires. Her voice is classic. An example from her journal: "OMFG-W00T! I have failed, left my duty undone, like so much dog poop on the gloaming sidewalk of the tragedy that is my life. Even as I sit here at the Metreon Starbucks, writing this, the froth slaves seem to move like silver-eyed zombies and my nonfat, soy Amaretto Mochaccino has gone bitter as snake bile. (Which is the bitterest bile you can get.) If there wasn't a totally hot guy two tables away, acting like he doesn't notice me, I would weep--but real tears make your mascara run, so I'm staying chilly in my despair. Your loss, cute guy, for I have been chosen. Suffer, bitch!" I laughed out loud--heartily--throughout this book."
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