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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within

by Matthew McKay, PH.D., Judith McKay, Peter D Rogers

About this title: While anger can serve vital functions to protect and defend the integrity of the self, it is frequently an instrument that destroys and abuses. This is a complete, step-by-step guide to changing habitual, anger-generating thoughts while developing healthier, more effective ways of meeting needs.

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within used book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within

by McKay, Matthew, PH.D., and McKay, Judith, and Rogers, Peter D

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Edition: 2nd ed. Binding: Trade paperback Publisher: New Harbinger Publications Date Published: 2003 ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

Description: Fine. Trade paperback (US). Glued binding. 306 p. read more

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition used book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition

by Matthew McKay; Peter D., Ph.D. Rogers; Judith McKay

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition new book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition

by Matthew McKay; Peter D., Ph.D. Rogers; Judith McKay

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition used book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition

by Matthew McKay; Peter D., Ph.D. Rogers; Judith McKay

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Binding: Paperback Publisher: New Harbinger Publications Date Published: 2003-11 ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within used book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within

by McKay; Rogers, Peter D.; McKay, Judith

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Binding: Paperback Publisher: New Harbinger Pubns Inc Date Published: 2003 ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

Description: Fine. X. Like new paperback! No spine crease. Appears unread. Text is clean, unmarked, tight. All items are carefully and securely packed to insure they arrive in the advertised condition. read more

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition used book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition

by McKay, Matthew; Peter D., Ph.D. Rogers; McKay, Judith

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Binding: Paperback Publisher: New Harbinger Publications Date Published: 11/1/2003 ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

Description: Very Good. 1572243449 May show signs of shelf wear. Choose EXPEDITED shipping, receive in 2-5 business days. Please email with questions. read more

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition used book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition

by McKay, Matthew

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Binding: Trade Paperback Publisher: New Harbinger Publications Date Published: 2003-11 ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

Description: Like-New. Format: Trade Paperback. Year: 2003. Slight shelf wear. read more

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Book: Fine/Like New

 

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within used book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within

by McKay; Rogers, Peter D.; McKay, Judith

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Ships from MI, USA Order this item today and it should be delivered to any address by Thursday, December 24.

Binding: Trade Paperback Publisher: New Harbinger Pubns Inc, Oakland, California, U.S.A. Date Published: 2003 ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

Description: Very Good Plus. 8vo-over 7¾"-9¾" Like new-crisp, bright, and unmarked. read more

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Book: Very Good

 

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition new book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition

by Matthew McKay~Peter D., Ph.D. Rogers~Judith McKay

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Binding: Paperback Publisher: New Harbinger Publications Date Published: November, 2003 ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within new book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within

by McKay, Matthew, PH.D., and McKay, Judith, and Rogers, Peter D

list price: $16.95

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Binding: Trade paperback Publisher: New Harbinger Publications Date Published: 2003 ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

Description: New. Trade paperback (US). Glued binding. 306 p. read more

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within new book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within

by McKay, Matthew / Rogers, Peter D., Ph.D. / McKay, Judith

price: $15.87

Ships from GA, USA Order this item today and it should be delivered to any address by Thursday, December 24.

Binding: Softcover Publisher: New Harbinger Pubns Inc Date Published: 2003-11-01 ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

Description: NEW. Softcover. From an inventory that is 100% brand-new, 100% direct from the publishers' distribution channel. We carry NO pre-owned, NO remaindered. We pack in CARDBOARD to ensure the pristine quality is maintained. (Bubble-wrap alone is NOT sufficient to protect from USPS equipment. ) Guaranteed brand-NEW, protected with CARDBOARD, your satisfaction is guaranteed. BKLUVID: 9781572243446. read more

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition used book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition

by Matthew McKay, Peter D., Ph.D. Rogers, Judith McKay

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Binding: Softcover ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

Description: Very Good. , Used-Very Good. Sound Copy. Mild Reading Wear. Books uploaded via isbn and stock photos may be different than actual book. read more

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Book: Very Good

 

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition used book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition

by Matthew McKay, Peter D., Ph.D. Rogers, Judith McKay

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Ships from CA, USA Order this item today and it should be delivered to any address by Thursday, December 24.

Binding: Softcover ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

Description: Good. FEW BENT CORNERS, HIGHLIGHTED AND UNDERLINED Used-Good Default Text. read more

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Book: Good

 

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition used book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition

by Matthew McKay, Peter D., Ph.D. Rogers, Judith McKay

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Binding: Softcover ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

Description: Very Good. 2nd Edition. VERY GOOD with very light wear to cover and pages. a no hassle guarantee on all our items. read more

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition used book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition

by McKay, Matthew; Peter D., Ph.D. Rogers; McKay, Judith

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Binding: PAPERBACK Publisher: New Harbinger Publications ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

Description: Very Good. 1572243449 paperback in very good condition. Pages are clean, binding is tight. Cover has slight shelf wear. Appears gently read. Satisfaction Guaranteed. read more

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Book: Very Good

 

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within new book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within

by Matthew McKay, Peter D., Ph.D. Rogers, Judith McKay, Matthew, Ph.D. McKay

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ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within new book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within

by McKay, Matthew; McKay, Judith And Rogers

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Edition: 2nd edition Binding: Paperback Publisher: NEW HARBINGER PUBN Date Published: 2003 ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

Description: New. While anger can serve vital functions to protect and defend the integrity of the self, it is frequently an instrument that destroys and abuses. This is a complete, step-by-step guide to changing habitual, anger-generating thoughts while developing he... read more

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When Anger Hurts Quieting the Storm Within, McKay new book

When Anger Hurts Quieting the Storm Within, McKay

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When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition new book

When Anger Hurts: Quieting the Storm Within, 2nd Edition

by Matthew McKay

price: $14.95

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Binding: Paperback Publisher: New Harbinger Publications Date Published: 2003 ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

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Book: New

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When Anger Hurts 2nd Edition used book

When Anger Hurts 2nd Edition

by McKay, Matthew

price: $15.52

Ships from OR, USA Order this item today and it should be delivered to any address by Thursday, December 24.

Edition: 2ND Binding: S TRADE PAPER Publisher: New Harbinger Publications ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

Description: Very good. read more

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Book: Very Good

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When Anger Hurts 2nd Edition used book

When Anger Hurts 2nd Edition

by McKay, Matthew

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Edition: 2ND Binding: S TRADE PAPER Publisher: New Harbinger Publications ISBN-13: 9781572243446 ISBN: 1572243449

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Page 1 of 1

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Customer rating: 4 out of 5 4 out of 5
Incomplete... But Worth Every Penny, Mar 22, 2009
By notmoses

"I was not surprised to discover that When Anger Hurts is used as a course textbook for those who will conduct court-mandated, spousal-abuse-deferment, anger management programs in some states and/or counties. I had encountered two of the authors before in online course material I was required to work through for that purpose some years ago.

By current standards, the book is a pretty thorough review of the Gestalt school, affect management and cognitive-behavioral approaches to anger management that were... even though sections here and there are substantially out of date or at least empirically suspect, given more current information... and significant advances in "emotion medicine" are left out entirely. Most of the citations are at least 25 years old, reflecting the best known data of the time, but not what is known today about brain function or therapeutic efficacy.

It is my understanding that some anger management counselors or therapists require their court-appointed "students" to read the book and even do the exercises therein. That doesn't seem like an entirely "bad" idea, but the book is written for readers at the college freshman level, and my experience is that most A/M attendees do not read at that level. Moreover, even when the mandated course is 48, 50 or 52 weekly sessions, there are probably too many concepts here for the sort of "clientel" with whom I am experienced.

I saw why I'd been told years ago that Lev Vygotsky's notion of "scaffolding" was crucial in such groups: The personality profile there tends to be at least passive-aggressive, if not narcissistic, antisocial, sociopathic and even sadistic. Such people rarely take well to didactic instruction. Thus, use of WHA as a course book is not suggested in that particular milieu (at least, not by me).

But as a training manual for counselors, a refresher or familiarization course for therapists, or a useful source of material for course design by Ph.D's, it looks like a good bet. The book digs into the issues from a cognitive perspective, pointing out (from the authors' perspective) the four principle mistaken (and, sadly, culturally pandemic) beliefs that underlie the lack of orientation towards personal responsibility: 1) Anger is solely - and wholly - a matter of brain chemistry; 2) Anger is instinctive; 3) Frustration must necessarily lead to aggression; and 4) It's useful to ventilate.

None of these common (and unconsidered) beliefs are true, and - in the best tradition of Albert Ellis, Aaron Beck, Martin Seligman, Jeffrey Young, Richard Wessler and others of the CBT / REBT way of seeing things - the authors do an effective job of punching all four thoroughly full of holes.

From the Freudian perspective of defense mechanisms, WHA also points out that anger is typically employed to 1) manage stress, 2) block painful sensations and emotions, 3) discharge over-stimulation, and 4) react quickly to perceived environmental threat. The book goes on to identify the specific mechanisms for manifesting these imperatives, including our culture's many distorted and inaccurate core beliefs, ideas, values and automatic assumptions, as well as the illogical appraisal, evaluation, interpretation and attribution schemas that result from such core beliefs.

The authors take an adroit left turn up the 101 to San Francisco for a dose of Fritz and Laura Perls' principle of personal responsibility from the `50s and `60s. They note that 1) blame is useless and counter-productive, 2) adaptation is useful and productive, 3) one is only a victim if he believes he is, 4) expecting others to change is useless, and 5) it almost always works best to either "adapt to let it go."

(If I'd been the fourth author of WAH, I would have inserted a section on Stephen Karpman's Drama Triangle, and the functional interactional concepts of support, detachment and adaptation vs. the dysfunctional interactional concepts of rescue (covert control), persecution (or punishment), and being the victim. I have found the KDT to be the single most effective graphic teaching aid for anger management - and a lot of other interpersonal and "intrapersonal" problems - I have ever used.)

Though it is certainly worth reading for its content, I found myself in disagreement with the utility of the suggested activities in Chapter 8 on "24-hour anger management." It is clear to me after more than 30 years in this line of work that such complex behaviors as those described are not only difficult to acquire and maintain at a high state of accessibility, they are almost always rejected out-of-hand by those with bipolar conditions and/or narcissistic- or passive-aggressive-spectrum character disorders.

My experience is that I do better to teach the topics covered in Chapter 9 and 10 on the logical fallacies and self-soothing. The authors do a fine job of this, covering some of my personal favorites, including 1) entitlement, 2) fairness (vs. "unfairness"), 3) dominance and submission maneuvers, 4) conditional ("if-then") assumptions, 5) retaliation, 6) black-and-white thinking (especially with regard to "all-good" and "all-bad" labeling), 7) projection (here, specifically assumption of intent), 8) magnification and 9) globalization.

They also describe and discuss 1) disciplined breathing, 2) mindfulness meditation (more or less what I teach as the "drop drill," 3) self-hypnosis (or "guided meditation," and 4) substance abuse for control of "intolerable" emotions and other sensory experience. Item 4 is, of course, probably the leading cause of treatment resistance to anger management interventions. But for the life of me, I do not understand why the authors did not tackle the matter of functional chemical interventions here.

The allied profession of psychopharmacology has made tremendous strides since WAH was first published in 1989. A brief explanation of the "soothing" benefits of such medications as Depakote valproix, Tegretol carbemazepine, Trileptal oxcarbazepine, Lamictal lamotragine, Topamax topamirate, Seroquel quetiapine, Zyprexa olanzepine, Abilify aripiprasole, Geodon ziprasidone, and Clozaril clozapine (for many, not all) would have been hugely informative.

I have seen these medications "fail," of course, and they are not "good substitutes" for therapy. But I have also seen them produce extremely useful results for manic and hypo-manic patients with anger and rage problems in conjunction with cognitive therapy.

The remainder of WAH provides useful material on problem solving, impulse re-direction, and effective interpersonal communication (or "assertion training"), though I have some difficulties with the utility of the chapters on "coping through health self-talk," "anger inoculation," and "response choice rehearsal." These `70s and `80s vintage strategies have not stood the test of empirical verification all that well, and, as noted earlier, I think that they don't because of the typically narcissistic and passive-aggressive character defense of the "terminally angry."

I was very pleased to see the new sections on "anger and children" and "spousal abuse" in this edition. David Lykken's stunning 1995 article "The Case for Parental Licensure" - which asserted in memorable fashion that the society we take for granted "manufactures criminals" - was enough to convince me that we will never be able to say too much about what parental anger does to the approval-seeking, pre-identity-formed mind.

Even with its faults and flaws, WHA is worth your time and money."

1 of 1 people found this review helpful.
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goodreads rating 5 out of 5 5 out of 5
Jan 6, 2009
By Bill, Missoula, MT

"You have anger? Deal with it now. Dont wait."

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goodreads rating 4 out of 5 4 out of 5
Jun 25, 2008
By Leslie, Auburn, AL

"I really like the approach this book takes. It helps you get out of "victim" mode and get into a "personal responsibility" mode. Basically, you are responsible for your own anger. If your needs are not getting met, you need to find other ways to meet your needs. This book gives several scenarios on how to do so. I very much recommend it for people dealing with past hurts."

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Customer rating: 5 out of 5 5 out of 5
Everyone should read this!, Jun 22, 2007
By Mikmaq, Great Falls, MT

"Anger is everywhere. We find ourselves angry with little provocation too often. Learn to recognize the signs and diffuse it before it explodes. Learn how to communicate our feelings and how to respond when someone else is angry. A lot of good advice for everyone."

1 of 3 people found this review helpful.
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Overall customer rating:
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7 of 7 (100%) customers said they would recommend this book to a friend.

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