JR Moehringer grew up listening for a voice, the voice of his missing father, a disc jockey who disappeared before JR spoke his first words. As a boy ...Show synopsisJR Moehringer grew up listening for a voice, the voice of his missing father, a disc jockey who disappeared before JR spoke his first words. As a boy, JR would press his ear to a battered clock radio, straining to hear in that resonant voice the secrets of identity and masculinity. When the voice disappeared, JR found new voices in the bar on the corner. A grand old New York saloon, the bar was a sanctuary for all sorts of men -- cops and poets, actors and lawyers, gamblers and stumblebums. The flamboyant characters along the bar taught JR, tended him, and provided a kind of fatherhood by committee. Torn between his love for his mother and the lure of the bar, JR forged a boyhood somewhere in the middle. When the time came to leave home, the bar became a way station -- from JR's entrance to Yale, where he floundered as a scholarship student; to Lord & Taylor, where he spent a humbling stint peddling housewares; to the New York Times, where he became a faulty cog in a vast machine. The bar offered shelter from failure, from rejection, and eventually from reality, until at last the bar turned JR away. In the rich tradition of bestselling memoirs about self-invention, THE TENDER BAR is by turns riveting, moving, and achingly funny. An evocative portrait of one boy's struggle to become a man, it's also a touching depiction of how some men remain lost boys.Hide synopsis
The Tender Bar: A Memoir (Hyperion Books) – Trade paperback (2006)
J R Moehringer
Trade paperback, Hyperion Books 2006
ISBN: 0786888768 ISBN-13: 9780786888764
Torn between the feminine comfort of his mother and the masculine camaraderie he finds in a series of bars and taverns, Moehringer details his difficult but loving upbringing.Torn between the feminine comfort of his mother and the masculine camaraderie he finds in a series of bars and taverns, Moehringer details his difficult but loving upbringing.Hide
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One hears a lot of things about people who frequent a bar, but this was not just a bar but the "tender bar" where relatives dispensed good advice, love, and acceptance mixed in with bountiful amounts of alcohol for good measure. If you can overlook the continuous drunken nature of the participants ,which might be hard if you have a family history of alcoholism, you will love the trail J. R. Moehringer takes you on as he grows to be an inquisitive teenager and an apprehensive Ivy Leaguer to a credible journalist. The ride isn't easy. There are tears and disappointments amidst the happy times. Tender but tough. That was the type of bar that nurtured . Hats off to Mr. Moehringer whose memories will always soften a fall but grace a reward.
Great writer, wonderfully drawn characters, couldn't wait to get back to reading it each night. What I loved most is that it doesn't rely on extreme and shocking events to carry it. No one gets raped, molested or thrown in a Turkish prison. It's an honest, realistic account of growing up searching for male role models and one's own identity. Refreshing in the wake of the embellishment scandals of 'A Million Little Pieces' and "Running With Scissors'.
Our book club rated it a 3.75 out of 5 (I gave it a 4.5).
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